The Four Year Old "Talk"

Oh help.

Murray:        (sigh) I wish I had a girlfriend.
Me:               Oh really?  What would you do with a girlfriend?
Murray:         Play with her.
Me:               (another sigh, this time, of relief)  That's nice.  Why do you want a girlfriend?
Murray:        Well, Mom, she showed me her butt.
Me:               (trying to stay calm)  Really?  Where?  When?
Murray:         I can't tell you where, but it was a few days ago.
Me:                What did you do?
Murray:         Well, I hid by a tree.
Me:               Good choice, Murray.  We shouldn't show our private parts, right?
Murray:         Right, but we can to our moms and dads, but not to our friends.
Me:               Yep, that's right!
Murray:         But, can we talk about a penis, a vagina, and a pink eye?


Oh help.